LDS Dating, Marriage, and Eternal Sealing

For Latter-day Saints, dating and marriage are not merely social or romantic arrangements—they are eternal covenants sealed by priesthood authority in the temple. This theological foundation shapes LDS dating culture, marriage expectations, and family structure in ways unique to the faith. Understanding LDS marriage requires grasping both the doctrinal underpinnings and the lived cultural practices that flow from them.

The church teaches that family relationships established through temple sealing can endure forever, not ending at death as secular marriages do. This promise—called "eternal marriage" or "sealing"—is the highest goal for most Latter-day Saint couples and shapes how they approach dating, courtship, and wedding plans.

The LDS View of Marriage as Eternal

In LDS theology, marriage is not a contract to be dissolved by mutual consent or death—it is a covenant, a sacred promise made before God and sealed by priesthood authority. D&C 132:19 teaches: "And again, verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife by my word...it shall be done unto them in all things whatsoever my servant hath put upon them, in this life and in the world to come."

This doctrine means that a couple sealed in the temple does not say goodbye at death. They will recognize and love each other in the resurrection and eternities. Children born to a sealed couple or later sealed to them are part of this eternal family unit. The prospect of eternal family is both comforting and profound—it suggests that mortality is not an ending but a transition, and that family bonds are among the most sacred things God has given us.

The promise also carries responsibility: sealed couples understand their marriage as a covenant with God, not just each other. Divorce severs the sealing (by approval of the First Presidency), and infidelity violates the covenant. This seriousness shapes how members approach marriage—not as a trial run, but as a lifelong commitment rooted in Christ.

Malachi 4:5-6 is often cited: the prophet Elijah would restore "the hearts of the fathers to the children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers." In LDS interpretation, this refers to the sealing power—the ability to bind families together across generations and eternity.

Dating in the Church

LDS dating culture is distinctive. Members are encouraged to date seriously with marriage in mind—not casual serial dating or dating for entertainment. The church teaches that dating should begin around age 16, with a progression toward more serious commitment and group dating in the early years.

**Young Single Adults (YSAs)** ages 18-30 form a distinct demographic. Many wards offer separate YSA wards with members their own age, creating intentional communities centered on finding marriage partners. The church runs YSA activities, dances, trips, and service opportunities specifically designed to help young members meet and marry within the faith.

**The Law of Chastity** is foundational. Members commit to remain sexually abstinent before marriage and faithful in marriage. This law shapes dating practices: couples avoid situations that could lead to sexual intimacy, wear modest clothing as a sign of commitment, and are taught that physical affection should be limited to hand-holding and appropriate kissing. The emphasis is on emotional and spiritual connection before physical intimacy.

In the United States, dating often becomes serious by late teens or early 20s, with many members marrying in their early-to-mid 20s. Two-year missions for men (ages 18-20) and 18-month missions for women (ages 19-21) interrupt the dating timeline—some couples marry before a mission, others wait for the missionary to return.

What Happens at a Temple Sealing

A temple sealing is the LDS marriage ceremony and the most sacred ordinance in the faith. Only endowed members (those who have received the endowment ceremony) can attend. The sealing takes place in a sealed temple room, with only the couple, witnessing authorities, and sometimes close family present.

The ceremony itself is brief—the sealing authority (usually a temple president or authorized sealer) places the couple's hands together across an altar and pronounces them sealed for time and all eternity. The power to seal is understood to come from the priesthood authority given to the church. Vows are simple and direct, focusing on the covenant to love and remain faithful.

After the sealing, the couple walks through the Celestial Room, the innermost and most sacred temple space, representing their arrival together in God's presence. Many families gather in the temple lobby afterward to celebrate, but non-members cannot enter the temple.

When Non-Members Can't Attend the Wedding

Here lies one of the deepest sources of pain in LDS culture: non-member family members cannot attend a temple sealing. Parents, siblings, grandparents—if they are not endowed members with a valid temple recommend—are excluded from the ceremony. This can be devastating for families divided by faith.

Some couples marry civilly first (outside the temple), allowing non-members to attend, then wait one year before receiving a temple sealing. In countries outside the US, civil marriage often precedes the temple sealing by necessity. In the United States, only temple-sealed couples enter for the sealing ceremony; civil marriage is not performed on temple grounds.

The church teaches that the sealing power is so sacred that its sanctity must be preserved, even at the cost of excluding loved ones. Many members accept this as doctrine, but it remains a source of heartache for interfaith families. Some parents of non-believing children have chosen not to marry in the temple to allow their non-member family to attend their wedding—a profound sacrifice in LDS culture.

Young Single Adult Culture

YSA wards and stakes have become central to LDS culture, especially in areas with high concentrations of young Latter-day Saints (Salt Lake City, Provo, Idaho, parts of California). YSA members typically remain in a YSA unit until age 30 or marriage, whichever comes first.

These units offer: - **YSA wards**: Separate congregations with age-appropriate leadership and classes - **Institute classes**: Religious education at local universities - **Social activities**: Dances, service projects, trips, game nights - **Dating support**: Implicit and explicit encouragement to date and marry

YSA culture has both positive and negative dimensions. At its best, it creates community and intentional spaces for meeting potential spouses within the faith. At its worst, it can create pressure to marry quickly and stigmatize those who don't marry young or marry outside the faith.

The church also operates **FamilySearch**, a genealogy platform that serves both as a tool for temple work and as a place where some YSAs connect with others interested in family history research.